Wednesday, June 4, 2014


I came across this website for a documentary while reading this post on  I read her post and then immediately went over to the website to watch the video.  It hit home.

I struggle with confidence and self esteem.  I guess digging REALLY deep I can say that I always have. In high school and unfortunately as young as junior high I turned to drugs for a sense of belonging in a group of people and to make me fun or fit in...  Luckily I got out of that crowd of people by my senior year of high school and before it ever became a real problem.

And then I think a lot of people get hit with the shock that who you were in high school doesn't matter in the real world anyway. That sense of belonging I had in my tiny town didn't matter when I graduated and moved away.

Then after high school I put on weight. At the time I thought it was the worst thing!  But now looking back- I think it was just me growing into my body.  I finally started to get hips and a butt. Now those are things I try to embrace.  Back then, I didn't love it.

Then of course started the ridiculous dieting cycle that I think most women go through.  The ups and downs and calorie restricting then putting the weight back on when I realized I can't maintain that forever.  I am just now realizing and accepting these patterns.

I have a huge problem with comparison.  I always have.  If only I could have her hair or her thighs.  That's what usually ends up bringing me down.  I think I mentioned before that I unfollowed a ton of people on Instagram recently because of this problem.

All of this is huge for me.  I have never admitted any of this out loud or even to myself until recently.  So I am working on it.  I am working on accepting me.  I am working on not turning to other people for my acceptance.  I am working on loving my body the way it is and working hard to become strong healthy and not just skinny.

I love the concept of this documentary and I think its something that women need to watch.  I hope they make it.  Its something we all need to see!!!

You can watch the video here.
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1 comment:

  1. Girl, we ALL go through this on some level. My problem is my face issue lately. It's practically made me a depressed hermit, so at least you don't have to deal with that. I look at everyone enjoying summer, and it gives me anxiety because the heat and humidity seem to be a trigger for Rosacea or something still undiagnosed. I think you are a beautiful girl, but you have to learn to love yourself even when you don't feel the way you want. Someone told me that you have to learn to accept yourself as you are or you will never be satisfied even at your best. It really helped me, and I haven't worried about my weight in quite some time. Also, when you compare yourself, remember that EVERYONE has something they don't like about themselves, so the girl who has the thighs you want, probably wishes her boobs were bigger or wants a nose job. You need to start focusing on the parts you LIKE about yourself.


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