Wednesday, June 4, 2014


I came across this website for a documentary while reading this post on  I read her post and then immediately went over to the website to watch the video.  It hit home.

I struggle with confidence and self esteem.  I guess digging REALLY deep I can say that I always have. In high school and unfortunately as young as junior high I turned to drugs for a sense of belonging in a group of people and to make me fun or fit in...  Luckily I got out of that crowd of people by my senior year of high school and before it ever became a real problem.

And then I think a lot of people get hit with the shock that who you were in high school doesn't matter in the real world anyway. That sense of belonging I had in my tiny town didn't matter when I graduated and moved away.

Then after high school I put on weight. At the time I thought it was the worst thing!  But now looking back- I think it was just me growing into my body.  I finally started to get hips and a butt. Now those are things I try to embrace.  Back then, I didn't love it.

Then of course started the ridiculous dieting cycle that I think most women go through.  The ups and downs and calorie restricting then putting the weight back on when I realized I can't maintain that forever.  I am just now realizing and accepting these patterns.

I have a huge problem with comparison.  I always have.  If only I could have her hair or her thighs.  That's what usually ends up bringing me down.  I think I mentioned before that I unfollowed a ton of people on Instagram recently because of this problem.

All of this is huge for me.  I have never admitted any of this out loud or even to myself until recently.  So I am working on it.  I am working on accepting me.  I am working on not turning to other people for my acceptance.  I am working on loving my body the way it is and working hard to become strong healthy and not just skinny.

I love the concept of this documentary and I think its something that women need to watch.  I hope they make it.  Its something we all need to see!!!

You can watch the video here.
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